An Annoyance of Muses

[Elindë]

Garo arad-o-onnad 'elir, penneth! -pecks writer on cheek-

Hannon - le-

I come bearing gifts! Well, a gift.

Wine?

-slightly deflated- How did you guess? -brings decanter from behind back-

...Dorwinion?

Naturally.

-blanches- I don't know if I can-

-laughs- Try anyway. -fills a small glass-

-takes a sip- O.O What percentage is this stuff?!

Stronger than spirits, or so I've heard.

... If I drink much of that I'll be on the floor -is a lightweight-

-shrugs- Well it's here if you change your mind... until I've drunk it all that is.

You're going to- -looks at size of decanter-

Pfft! -settles on desk- That's nothing

Great... what a relief...

[Elindë]

-wants to sing along to Long Live the Halflings (BBC Radio LotR)but doesn't know all the words- -has a plan-

Phoeeenix? -hands earphone-

...

Long live the Halflings! Praise them with great praise!
Cuio i Pheriain anann! Aglar'ni Pheriannath!
Praise them with great praise, Frodo and Samwise!
Daur a Berhael, Conin en Annun! Eglerio!

A laita te, laita te! Andave laituvalmet!
Cormacolindor, a laita tarienna!
Praise them! The ring-bearers, praise them with great praise!
Frodo and Samwise, praise them with great praise!

-fives-

(He must be a little drunk after all that wine; he wouldn't normally agree to do that. Either that or he's actually taking note of my birthday beyond wishing me a good day O.o Well, there has to be a first time for everything)

[Elindë]

O.o I never told you guys about Phoenix's new crown! -jabs- We never told them about your new crown.

-shrugs- And?

We should tell them! -grins- It brings out the blue in your eyes.

-groans- Yes, because the blue in sapphire eyes is so very much in danger of being overlooked.

-ignores-
Well his autumn/winter one was made of red leaves and berries which, to be honest, makes him look like a small child's painting.

-splutters- Why?!

All those primary colours. Now shush. So this one is made of bluebells! British-esque ones, not Spanish. We don't like Spanish ones, now do we?

-has no idea what she's on about-

And there are some creamy-yellowy-white blossoms in it too which is very pretty and of course some green foliage; silvery-bluey-green leaves for the most part.

-blank-

-smiles- It looks very becoming.

I feel like a foreign curiosity.

You are a foreign curiosity!

Thanks for that

[Elindë]

-sitting on desk- ...seriously though why bring trees inside? Why not hold the ceremony outside? There are plenty of trees there and it wouldn't look odd.

I think there are few places where you can hold a Christian wedding outside. Not that that bothers me... though it would be nice to get married in a church.

-shakes head- Woods. Woods are the only way.

Like in 'Jam and Jerusalem'.

What?

'Jam and Jerusalem'. Such an epic series! Two of the characters got married in the woods... And the groom made a speech in Elvish. Well 'Elvish'.

-raises eyebrow- Oh?

Yeah, basically 'murmurmurmurmurmur mellon murmurmurmurmurmur edro murmurmurmurmurmur undomiel'

-smiles- Sounds pretty eloquent to me.

It really wasn't. It was all just random words or gobbledy-goop. Don't quote me on this but I think he said 'laisse' at one point...

But that's Quenya.

-grins- It would be romantic to say part of the ceremony in Sindarin.

-crosses legs- Well! I can tell you my vows if you like.

Ooh, please!

Right! -pause- -long pause- -even longer pause- Uh...

What's wrong?

Nothing! nothing!

You can't remember them, can you?

Of course I can! I've married hundreds of couples but-

But what?

-waves hand- We changed the wording!

Awww, Eldu!

-exasperated- Give me a minute!


(He remembered them eventually. Bless! And to be fair, he got married 5,500 years ago so...)

[Elindë]

... so now she's basically said I'm a tyrant. -pouts-

Well that's a good thing.

How so?

When you're in charge, it's best to be kind to the masses and horrible to those who might cause serious trouble. -grins- I find it funny... and it can be quite spectacular. When I'm in a bad mood, even the densest of crowds part for me.

Like the reed sea for Moses.

-pause-

Who?

Don't worry. -sweatdrops-

[Elindë]

-reread Simple House unbeknownst to Eli-

-turns- -jumps- I thought you'd gone!

-quietly- Eli; I can't go back.

You promised you would. You promised Callier and have promised me twice.

-whispers- Iston. -pretends not to be crying- But I can't.

-concerned- Why?

All those things, all those problems. They're still there, waiting to pounce.

But you can cope with them. You said you had a way...

I did but now I know how Callier feels about me now.

-reassuringly- Stop worrying about Callier-

But she'll tear down my facades and then I'll be back to where I was then. Worse maybe. And if I don't drop them she'll try to kill me. -looks at Eli imploringly- I can't do it, please don't make me.

>.<

[Elindë]

How did Philosophy and Ethics go?

Yeah, I've got a bone to pick with you about that...

Yeers -settles on desk-

Why, Phoenix, did you decide to badger me with how your world was created when I was battling to separate out the particulars of the design and cosmological arguments (only to realise half way through that the people I'd credited for the anthropomorphic and aesthetic principles actually belong with utilitarianism)?

-shakes head- This is what happens when you cram in the hour before you leave the house! Things get mixed up.

Great, so someone who's never sat a written exam in his life is giving me tips.

Looks like it.

And I'll have you know I've been revising all last week!

Umhm? And that first question was the only question I was there for.

And that happened to be the question that I messed up the system by which you indicate which question you're answering on.

-shrugs- It's not such a big deal; just correct it underneath-

they aren't sent off themselves; they're scanned into computers so yes it does matter. -glares-

-silence-

If I let you flick my hair will you drop this?

-thinks- That is tempting... (he's had it cut recently so it's all bouncy. It's rather short (for him); below the shoulders at the back and shaped to bounce on them at the front. To be fair it was getting ridiculously long; down to his waist. He was dangerously close to looking like a blond Elrond ^^ And he's washed it so it's a lot lighter, in both meanings of the word. It's so flickable!!!)
No! You can't buy me like that.

-blinks and bats eyelashes-

Actually I might have to steal that haircut... even though it won't look nearly so good on me. Damn you, straight hair!

-grins-

What now?!

Most of the teenage girls (and some of the guys) and young women in the country have straighteners for the purpose of obtaining poker-straight hair. Your hair is as poker straight naturally as you're going to get-

And I wish it was wavy; yes, I know.
And besides it isn't straight all the way down, look! -swishes hair in his face- I have a wave, a wave!

All the way past your shoulders? That's not a wave, that's come from how you sleep on it.

-glares-

So, going to take up my offer?

-bites lip- -cracks- Alright then. -flicks... flicks.... giggles.... flicks-

EDIT: no, you stupid code! That isn't wrong, you just can't spell 'colour' properly!

-titters-

-hates having to edit posts-

[Elindë]

-already lounging on desk reading a letter when Eli comes in-

I need your opinion on something.

-still reading- I'm all ears.

No. -spins round and puts hands on hips- You need to look at me.

Mmm -looks up for a split second before looking down again-

For some amount of time!

What's the problem?

-sighs- I'm getting my haircut on Thursday and I don't-

-grins- 'Monkey see, monkey do'

-hurt- You don't even know what a monkey is!

-raises eyebrow in agreement- Even so, you know what a monkey is and the comment was directed to you not me.

-sighs again and shakes head- Anyway, I don't know if I should just get a trim or have it cut short and styled.

-reading again- Mhmm.

Look at me, will you!!

-throws down letter and looks at Eli, hands in lap- -considers for a while- How short are we talking?

-shrugs- Shoulder-length.

-purses lips- Bit short for a woman really.

-exhasperated- Phoenix!

Let me finish! This won't be just straight round the face like a picture frame I hope? I can't see that suiting you.

No -demonstrates with hands- Shaped round the front-

Like mine?

-blushes- A little.

-smiles- How did I guess? And the other option is just a trim on your current... mane?

Uh huh. -sighs and flaps arms- Whenever I grow my hair long I mean to do something with it and I never do!

It's not what I would call 'long'. 'Long' is when you're tripping over it.

I just don't feel good in what I have at the moment, but you're right; it isn't long.

To be fair, recently you don't 'feel good' no matter what you're wearing or how your hair's styled.

-shifts- Yeah well, having a Valar-fair muse around doesn't exactly help raise my self esteme.

-leans forward- Look, penneth, I know I am counted beautiful but it is a stolen beauty. I shouldn't look like this; at least your face is your own.

-sad-

-slides off desk and holds arms out- Someone needs a hug, no?

-nods-

[Elindë]

-jumps up and down-

-irked- Why are you jumping? You're shaking the whole house!

-grins- Just did my second and last RS exam. I think it went better than my other one and I never have to sit a Philosophy and Ethics exam ever again.

... But why are you jumping?

Why aren't you jumping?

-thinks- Fair point.

-jump-

[Elindë]

-randomly quotes- 'These are the prisoners, O king.' -spots muse's grinning reflection- -pales-

-clears throat- 'Indeed? Loose their bonds; they need no ropes here. There is no escape from my magic doors for those who are once brought inside.'

-headdesks-

(Thorin) 'What have we done, O king? Is it a crime to be lost in the forest, to be hungry and thirsty? To be attacked by spiders? -Eh?- Are spiders your tame beasts or your pets, that killing them makes you so angry?
(Elf-king) 'It is a crime to wonder in my realm without leave. Do you forget that you were in my kingdom, using the path that my people made? Did you not twice attack my people-?
(Thorin) 'We never did-
(Elf-king) 'You attacked my people at their merrymaking in the forest and roused the spiders with your riot and clamour! Now, I have a right to know what brings you here. (silence) Well? (silence) As you wish! I shall keep you all in prison until you have learnt sense and manners. Take them to the cells!
(Elf) Take them away!'
-grins-

-realises that was the radio version- -thinks: shit, he's learnt the radio version!- -sweatdrops-

[Elindë]

-reads latest Hobbit update-

-shuffle in and read over Eli's shoulder-

'Orlando Bloom confirmed to reprise his role as Legolas'

Well we all knew that was going to happen.

But it wasn't official.

-leaves-

Where's he going?

To drink himself under the table I expect.

Seems like a sensible plan.

-sniggers-

[Elindë]

-has diamond on desk beside her- this really is a nice gem you know... -hears uneaven footsteps on the landing- heads up.

-leans on desk, looking tired-

Look who it isn't. -bows- It is an honour to have His Majesty in my humble abode.

-gives death-glare- Shut up and give me my brooch back. -holds out hand-

-picks gem up and looks at it- What, this one? But you have so many; can't I admire it for a while longer?

-sharply- No! -is worried by how Eli got it in the first place-

Come on, Eldu, you have so many! And I'm not going to do anything to it in the mean time.

-growls-

Fine. -puts brooch down- I'll return this when you return The Hobbit.

But you have so many!

-raises eyebrows-

-sighs- -lowers hand- Fine.

Well, aren't you going to get the book?

-blinks- No, I haven't finished it yet.

-surprised- You, the Elf who can properly read the tale of Beren and Luthien in an hour have failed to read The Hobbit in two days?

Yes; believe it! -pouts- It's in English and your alphabet's strange. Not even Elrond can read it at a normal speed.

Seriously? Hang on, Elrond?

Mhmm

Just who's reading this?

Uh, Galion, Lasgalen, Elf-Witch's husband, Peredhel and me.

-blinks-

-waves hand dismissively- Large boring meeting.

But Elrond knows the story anyway... Gandalf told it to him.

He did?

Of course he did! When they went back through Imladris.

So Elrond, who has a very small part to play in things, got the whole story and I didn't? -glares- No one tells me anything!

Maybe if you didn't-

Noldorin bastard.

Eldu! Don't be racist! Wait, why am I surprised? Of course he's racist. >.<

-huffs- No one tells me anything. 'Oh he's so out of th eway he may as well be so behind on current affairs that when something does happen it has to come into his halls and tap him on the shoulder before he knows anything about it.

Maybe if you were a little nicer to people? -has no idea how he has any international relations with an attitude like that-

[Elindë]

-reading English coursework restraints booklet (easy when you see it, hard to explain)-

-stands behind chair- -drapes arms over Eli's shoulders- What are you reading?

Possible themes for second English coursework essay.

Already?!

Mhmm.

Quick turn around.

-sighs- You're telling me.

-crouches to one side of the chair, arms still draped round Eli's shoulders- Do you have to do all of them?

No, just one... on a piece of fiction of my choice. I have no idea which text to do and how to read it!

You don't have to decide now, surely.

True... though I haven't got all that long to think about it.

-hugs loosely- You'll be fine. What are your current thoughts?

Uh... feminist reading of the Oddysey, metaphors in Beowulf and marxist reading of LotR?

-shrugs- -rests head against edge of chair- I wouldn't know if you could do that or not; I don't know what 'Marxist' is. And besides the accounts I heard of the War of the Ring were very bias. -hugs tighter- When are the uni open days?

I don't know off the top of my head-

Because I need to know when to leave days clear, don't I?

-surprised- You're coming to some of them?

My dear, I'm coming to all of them. I need to know where I'll be spending much of the autumn after next too.

-blinks-

-in Eli's ear- You didn't think I'd leave you on your own when you know no one, did you?

You're... going to stay with me?

When you're awake, yes.

-stunned- You... you don't have to do that-

But I do. I am your muse, even if by choice, and as such it's my duty to look after you in your time of need. Why do you think I'm being so... difficult now? -smiles- -rests head on Eli's shoulder-

Phoenix... are you alright?

Mae, what makes you think I'm not?

You're being nice.

You're so polite-

And, unless I'm much mistaken, flirting with me.

-sniggers- This isn't flirting.
What I plan to do should my name make your final coursework draft wouldn't be either... despite appearances.

O.o What are you planning?

I don't like to say. -poecks Eli on cheek before standing up- It might negatively affect your choice of text.

-watches muse, eyes wide-

-reads exression like Galadriel reads minds- -sighs- It's not that! Filthy child. -smiles- -waggles fingers in a wave- I'll leave you to your reading.

[Elindë]

-to world in general- Phoenix makes the right decisions most of the time, but when he makes a faux pas he really blows out XD

How'd you figure that out?

Well the Raft Elves must witter on about your Serious Mistakes for some reason.

-sighs- Galion's been filling you in, hasn't he?

-grins- At the moment, my favourite is the one where you basically said all mortals raised by Elves were FUBAR'ed, and then turned round to see Aragorn staring at you. And you wondered why he was so put out.

>.<

EDIT: 'This isn't just a mistake; this is an Elvenking mistake'. [Parody of the M&S adverts]

What?

Me and Willow in one of our frees. You're getting famous.

[Elindë]

Where once was light
Now darkness falls
Where once was love
Love is no more
Don't say - goodbye
Don't say - I didn't try...

These tears we cry
Are falling rain
For all the lies you told us
The hurt, the blame!

And we will weap
To be so alone
We are lost!
We can never go home

So in the end
I'll be - what I will be
No loyal friend
Was ever there for me

Now we say - goodbye
We say - you didn't try...

These tears you cry
Have come too late
Take back the lies
The hurt, the blame!

And you will weep
When you face the end alone
You are lost!
You can never go home

You are lost!
You can never go home

(I swear he's trying to depress me; he was singing Into the West when I got up. I cry when Lennox sings it but an Elf who will sail one day singing it... omg >.<. Compared to that, listening to Gollum's Song's easy)